He Renews My Faith

I have been around long enough to know that when I am hungry, angry, lonely and tired (HALT) it is time to take care of me!  I know I am at that stage when all I can do is weep.  Yesterday was one of those days...  Its interesting to me today, after having slept, eaten, gotten in the Word, and taken a step back and looked at myself; how all that emotion can simply go away.  I found myself yesterday literally yelling at God.  "You said you are my provider, you said you're our Redeemer, our Deliverer..."  I guess I wasn't feeling provided for, redeemed, or delivered at the time.

God, I have learned, is far bigger than anything I can throw at him.  He can handle my meltdowns, like no one else can.  He can handle my anger, my frustration, my doubts and all my pain; whether or not I sugar-coat it or I put it out there plainly.  My prayer (of yelling) was just as holy as my prayer in quiet.  They were both honest and from my heart.  They were both a cry to Him! and therefore they were from a place of humility.  I need Him. End of story. 

The best part of walking with God is that He walks with me.  He is always here, even when I am freaking out and no one else wants to be near me; and truth be told I don't want to be around anyone!  He doesn't walk away and say "when you get it together, give me a call".  He doesn't require me to "doll it up", before I bring it to Him.  He simply says "Come.  Come as you are."  "Come unto me, all you, who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest." 

When I come, He renews my strength.  He renews my faith.  He takes the burdens. He leaves His peace.  He gives me rest and He reassures me, like no one else can.

I am His, and He is mine.   Amen