Do you ever wonder why God answers some prayers and not others? I can't help but ponder this over and over. In all the years I have walked with the Lord, it has always been the one thing I would love to have an answer for. Some prayers I send up are answered quickly (like the one for my son last night!--Thank you Lord!) and others, I ask and ask and ask; some for years on end. I have studied the Scriptures and I have not found the answer to this quandry yet. I know that fasting and obedience and tithing and the like are all pertinent to a life devoted to God (spiritual disciplines) and while I am not perfect, I do practice these disciplines, but there is something so mysterious when it comes to prayer. Maybe I will never have the answer. Maybe, it is just one of the great mysteries of God. I can deal with that; but there is something in my Spirit that tells me to keep searching...
I am often surprised by the power of the Spirit of God, as I hope most of us are! I often, in my human thinking, put God in categories. Let me explain. There are certain times when I pray specifically that I am certain of what is "my job" and what is "God's job" when it comes to the answer to what I am asking of God. The written Word is clear as to what my position is and I am confident that as I stand in that position, and pray or fast or whatever, that God will do the rest as He sees fit. For example, I told my son yesterday that He was going to go to Church Camp. I had prayed about it for two weeks, ( I know that sounds strange, but trust me, it was a heart thing that required it) and finally believed that God had shown me that I must stand in the position He ordained (my parental authority). I have quite often run my home as a democracy--very rarely taking the authoritarian position, and some of my compromises have lead to disaster! Anyway, this was the position God required me to stand in, and so I did. My prayer was "okay Lord, I will take this position as you instruct, and I believe YOU will take care of the rest." I braced myself for the ensuing battle and I stood firm and lovingly behind my shield of faith as the flaming arrows shot from my little rebel's mouth! I continued to pray and asked others to join me (as the Word instructs) and by midnight, my son agreed that he would go to camp!
As I lay in bed last night, thanking God, and knowing full well that the battle for my son's heart conversion is not over and in fact, has only just begun, I asked God what the difference was in this prayer as opposed to others. I fell asleep rehearsing various Scripture in my mind and really seeking the answer as if there were some hidden angle or puzzle I had to figure out. This morning I woke with the thought (from God and His Word) that there is nothing hidden--everything in Him is light. He is not up there on His throne saying "I've got her now, she will never figure this one out--ha ha!" He is not a God of secrets. Jesus said that He revealed everything He knew of the Father so that WE could be one with Him as He is one with the Father.
Crazy thought satisfied! I have decided to continue with my study of the Scripture and beef up my prayer life. I don't know if I will find the answer to this question, but I do know that I do not know much, so this decision will be for the good!
Holy Spirit, I invite you to come upon me in power, so that I may be a witness throughout the world. In the Name above all Names, Jesus, I pray. Amen
Don't discredit the power of the human spirit - you are a remarkable woman with stoic resolve. I've marveled at your strength! Give yourself credit for the tremendous efforts you have made all on your own for a better life, especially for your son.
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